Clare Struzziery, Staff Writer

March 8, 2024

“One of the things you can’t do, as a parent, is challenge the grades,” English Faculty Richard Baker said.

At Nobles, tremendous value is placed upon the relationships within our school community. The relationships students build with their teachers, advisors, coaches, and peers are hallmarks of the Nobles experience. However, a relationship that often goes unnoticed is that between parents and faculty. Media reports show national trends of increasing parental involvement in all aspects of their children’s lives. The idea of “helicopter” and “snowplow” parents supervising and removing obstacles for their children is common, but how intense and significant is this dynamic at Nobles? 

Aside from regular communication with their child’s advisor, parent involvement at Nobles exists mainly in two categories. The first is within the college counseling process. “It is a partnership between us and families and students, and all voices are really important and necessary,” Associate Director of College Counseling Nora Dowley-Liebowitz said.

The second, more controversial form of involvement concerns grades and course placements. “There tends to be a desire on the part of a lot of parents to want honors courses over non-honors courses,” Science Faculty Sheila McElwee said. McElwee added that teachers’ course placements for their students reflect thoughtful consideration of all aspects of a student’s performance in their class. Grades also exist in this sphere as something that should be determined only by teachers.

Nobles helps to protect teachers’ decisions through the protocol that delineates how parents are encouraged to interact with the school. Parents are instructed to direct concerns or questions to their child’s advisor, who serves as their main point of contact. The advisor can then reach out to a class dean or a department head, who, if necessary, can reach out to a teacher. “[This] helps the family member and advisor to start to develop a really important relationship that will be critical for their child,” Dowley-Liebowitz said. 

Although parent involvement can often have negative consequences for their student’s education, it is not all that common, according to faculty members. Parents have little to no direct contact with their children’s teachers. “Initially, at the beginning of the year, I might get a couple of parents who are trying to put themselves into the mix,” Science Faculty Bob Moore said. However, these parents are quickly directed to their child’s advisor, who will handle their concerns. 

However, while parent involvement with academics is not widespread, it has been increasing steadily over time. “I started back in the late 1980s, and I think at that time, parents viewed teachers as the educational professionals…now, I think parents see themselves as the educational professionals,” McElwee said. This can be attributed to various causes. First, parents have more and more access to information concerning both their child and the school. Some students text their parents immediately after receiving a grade or their course placements, and parents can use email to search for and contact any teacher or administrator. In addition, an increasingly competitive college process has contributed to these cultural shifts. 

Nobles, at times, can lend itself to these particular types of parent advocacy. As a rigorous academic community, the school attracts ambitious students who, in many cases, have proactive families. “The families who choose to send their children to private school tend to have a little bit more practice or experience in advocating for their child,” Class III Dean Jane Strudwick said. In addition, Nobles’ impressive college matriculation can lead parents to view the school as a stepping stone to higher education, thus increasing their expectations for their child. Finally, Nobles’ independent school status forms a cause for advocacy. “I think that many independent school parents rightly feel a certain level of expectation and involvement,” McElwee said. 

Parental involvement tends to overstep boundaries and prove detrimental to their child’s educational experience. Communicating with teachers when facing a challenge is an important skill for all students. “There’s a ton of opportunity there that I think can be lost if another adult steps in too soon,” Class I Dean Kimberly Libby Genecco said. Parent intervention also reflects high, sometimes unrealistic, standards for their child’s performance. “Between our expectations as teachers and the expectations of parents, [there can be] a lot of anxiety on the part of kids,” English Faculty Alden Mauck said. 

Parent involvement in their child’s academics stems from love, though it often conveys itself as additional pressure or an excessive focus on academic performance. Teachers have a more holistic understanding of how students fare in different classes than anyone else, and families should have trust in the quality of their child’s education. Lastly, one of the most important things a student can learn is how to ask teachers for help. Sometimes, the best thing a parent can do for their child is to let them handle that tough quarter grade or disappointing math placement on their own. 

(AI-Generated: DALL-E)